I finally downloaded Yahoo Messenger tonight. A couple of my friends only have this form of chat, so I decided to do it.
Apparently, big mistake. I HATE, HATE, HATE---did I mention I HATE?---HATE when complete strangers randomly instant message me. I hate it on AOL, I hate it anywhere. I finally blocked all my AOL screen names from instant messages for this reason. I cannot EVER imagine being SUCH a LOSER or such a lonely person or so bored or so anything that I would have to instant message someone I don't know. It galls me to think that people are going through profiles, finding people they are interested in & saying stupid shit like, "Bob, s/m/29, wanna chat?" or "Hi, I'm Bob, wanna chat?" or "Hi, where are you from?" or "Hi, I'm Bob, do you like to fuck?" or ANYTHING! If I don't know you, DON'T bother me! When I am online, generally, I am writing emails or writing in my journal....I enjoy chatting with certain friends from time to time, but I do NOT go online JUST to sit around & chat. It drives me NUTS when someone is IMing me, & when/if I don't IM right back instantly, they say, "Are you too busy to chat?" or something like that, as if I couldn't possibly have anything better to do online than just chat. Do people really go online JUST to chat with people? I mean, really? I NEVER have done that. I will chat WHILE I am doing other things, but I never just sit online & chat. How lame! Get a life! Go out & chat with a real person! When people get all haughty with me when I tell them I am busy, that pisses me off! It happened earlier today...I was chatting with this guy, & writing in my journal at the same time. Maybe 5 minutes went by in which I didn't say anything to him. So he writes, "?????" And I said, "???? what?" And he says, "Well, you aren't saying anything." ARGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I am not just sitting here to chat with you. I am not saying anything cause I am doing something constructive & I have nothing to say to you! If I have something to say, I'll say it! Now, you could say, if you don't feel like chatting, then don't log on chat. Well, I cannot even count how many times I was IMed by strangers while logged into AOL, which has that automatic chat function (until I figured out how to block it). I would just be online to write or email & FREAKS would just randomly email me & start asking me person questions like "Do you have a boyfriend?" & other such "NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS" questions! This would even happen when I was logged into screen names where I didn't even have a picture attached to my profile! More than not being able to imagine IMing a stranger to "hook up," I certainly wouldn't IM someone to hook up if I had no friggin' clue what they looked like! And then they would have the audacity to ask me to send them a picture! ARRRRGGGGHHHH! Gimme a friggin' break! The internet is a GREAT thing, I spend lots of time on it doing constructive things....but you need to not spend your life on it, & you need to not use it in LIEU of real life encounters. I frankly don't even understand going into chat rooms. I kinda found in interesting the first 2 months or so that I had the internet....and then when I realized all people talk about is sex & wanting to "chat privately" (& we ALL know what that means), the effect quickly wore off. Go out & join a club in real life if you need to make new friends. I am not saying that internet friends are not great, cause they most definitely are. But they shouldn't be your ONLY friends, & going into a chat room just to make friends seems a bit odd to me. It just seems a bit nervy to me to disturb a complete stranger online & start asking them personal questions. Heck, at LEAST email them first, describe yourself, maybe include a pic, & say something like, "Would you be interested in chatting online sometime?" But for Heavens sake.....have some CLASS & do not bother people you do not know. Yes, I realize not everyone is as "unfriendly" as me (which is hysterical, cause I am one of the most friendly people I know in real life), but just have a little class & allow people some online privacy.
So this guy randomly IMs me on Yahoo tonight. He starts chatting with me AS IF HE KNOWS ME!!!!!! I asked him "Who are you?" And he responds, "Mr Right!" The NERVE!!!!!!!! ARGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH! So, I waited....and waited....while he sent a million smiley faces. And repeated my question. "Who are you?" He said I had met him in "that club." "What club"? I asked, since while I am a member of a couple of GROUPS, I am not a member of any clubs. He said, "Hot or Not". I told him I had no clue, still, of who he was & how he knew me. He finally sent me a link to his picture...and sure enough, I remembered him....as a guy who I distinctly said "no" to wanting to meet....several times. We were NOT a match. And I was clueless as to how he got my Yahoo Messenger name. So I go into "privacy options" on Yahoo Messenger, & click that I don't want ANYONE but people on my friends list to be able to IM me. It didn't work. He still got through. So then, after I have already been what *I* would assume was rude, he says, "Are you married?" ARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH! I said "no." He said, "Divorced? Boyfriend?" I said, "No/dating." And his response was something like "bummer....I will let you go then....but if you ever break up, you know where I am." I resisted the desire to say something like, "I'll be sure to look you up," & just said, "Thanks, good luck to you." And then he proceeded to IM me saying stupid shit & with stupid smiley face icons about 10 more times....and he was gone. AMEN! I tell you....I am FAR too nice.
Seriously....are these people total losers or what? No need to answer, cause I already have MY opinion of that. Do NOT IM me if you don't know me. Would you go up to someone sitting on a bus bench & say, "Hi, I am single, white, 29 years old....are you married? Do you like to fuck?" NO!!!!! OF COURSE YOU WOULDN'T!!!!!!! At least, I sure hope not! So what is it about the internet that makes people behave in ways they wouldn't in real life? The internet is not a bar. Chat programs are not bars. They are not "singles meetings." They are not meat markets. People actually get stuff done & use the internet constructively, & occasionally chat with people they know. Occasionally, through internet groups you are on, you make new friends. But don't use the internet as your personal dating/making new friends service! Sheesh!!!!!!