Pollyanna (alicenwndrln) wrote,

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Want the laugh of a lifetime???? And when commenting, remember whomever is responsible for sending this to me is reading this, & might just add you to the list (you know, if you comment something rude).

An email I just received (it was sent to my LJ address, so it's obviously someone from LJ)...it was titled "We need to talk":

"You have been reported by an anonymous concerned Christian friend. The group I work with, Jesus Watch, and I are concerned about your online activity. Now keep in mind we aren't 'attacking' you or anything, we write to you as friends. It is my hope that you receive our lord and saviour Jesus Christ into your life.

Now you are probably interested in what sins have been reported. Think back and honestly try to see if you have taken part in any of the online activities:

- Glorifying fornication or practicing in 'virtual' fornification.

- Blaspheme.

If you feel you have been unfairly put on our sinner list, go here: http://www.jesuswatch.org

Before you decide however that you do not want to take advantage of our encouragement, remember that it is never too late to repent and ask our lord and saviour Jesus Christ for forgiveness. Some things to keep in mind are:

Forgiveness is not just a trait our Lord and Saviour can possess. You too can learn to forgive.

James 5-20 Let him know, that he which converteth the sinner from the error of his way shall save a soul from death, and shall hide a multitude of sins.

Receive more words of encouragement or be removed from our sinners list at http://www.jesuswatch.org"

Ummm....blaspeme? The only word I consider blaspheme is the "G.D" word, & I almost NEVER use that word, & NEVER in my journal. I don't see "fuck" "shit" or "damn" as sinful....they are just words. And whenever I use the term, "Jesus Christ," it's because I am actually saying "for the love of Jesus," etc....is that blaspheme?

And fornication...well, you have to believe in the Bible to believe that fornication outside of marriage is a sin. And sorry to say, I don't believe in the Bible. And I don't believe that having sex with someone you care about is a sin. Casual sex...eh, not the best idea. But if there's feelings involved...I don't see anything wrong with it. Sorry. Even if I was married, I'd still TECHNICALLY be sinning....since, supposedly, sex is supposed to ONLY be had for procreation.....and I don't want kids.

Ah well....guess I am doomed to Hell.

Surely this email is a joke. Because anyone who takes religion THIS seriously has a PROBLEM. Fanatic, anyone???? If this was from someone on my friends list....kindly remove yourself from my friends list. Thank you.

***editor's note: As my bro so lovingly pointed out, I've been had. LOL! The sad thing, though, is that someone would do this for real...you know they would. And just WHO duped me? Was that you, robont???? Whomever it was gets a spanking!***
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