Where am I going & why am I in this basket???

Why am I scared?

I am about to go to the doctor. No, seeing the doctor in itself is not what scares me.

I am just having scary symptoms. I can BARELY swallow. My throat is so swollen that I can just barely swallow, & it hurts severely to do so. This is making me really uncomfortable, & upset, because it started in the middle of the night (I simply haven't been able to shake whatever I have had since last week), & I didn't sleep well. Today is a long day, & I am exhausted already. Tonight was supposed to be my last night performing in the treelighting ceremony, & now I don't know if I can do it. Right now, I could barely talk enough to make the doctor's appointment. Seriously. My throat is THAT swollen. It hurts to talk. And we are having our work group dinner party tonight. And I fly home in 2 days. What great timing.

I love the "practice of medicine."

A visit to the doc & they still don't know what's wrong with me. More than likely, it's strep throat, but it "might not be." I've got most of the symptoms, but my throat doesn't have the "typical" characteristics of strep. So he did a throat culture. It will take 2-3 days to get the results, & IF it IS strep, he will call me & prescribe some anti-biotics. He is holding off on the antibiotics for now, in case it isn't something that will be helped by them (we all know it's not good to take antibiotics if you don't need them). But the crappy thing is this: more than likely, it IS strep, & this is 2-3 days I will be needing drugs that I will have to wait. My throat hurts MASSIVELY, & I have to wait to medicate. 2-3 more days of pain & sleepless nights....because the lab is slow. Geez, when someone is in bad pain, put a damn rush on the labwork! I told him I am flying away on Saturday, so if he doesn't get the lab results before then & call me, I won't even be around to get the prescription I need. He seemed certain that he will have the results by then. So....I will be horribly sick for a full day of air travel, including getting to the airport 2 hours early, waiting around, standing on my feet, lugging my luggage around...all with possible strep throat. I haven't felt this bad in a while. A cold is miserable enough...and when you throw in fever & SEVERE throat pain...it's even worse.

Thank you, everyone, for your well wishes. It means a lot.

I forgot the best part. The doc says, "You will probably lose your voice." "Oh great," I say, "I am an actress & singer....I make my living with my voice." His eyes widen, & he looks at me sympathetically & says, "You WILL get better." But of course, I won't, as long as I am WAITING to get medication I need. Meanwhile, my temperature has risen to 100 degrees, & is still rising. I hope I don't get pneumonia just in time to fly home. I truly don't have time to "rest," since every day until I leave is go, go, go!

**sigh**