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Where am I going & why am I in this basket???
 
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Monday, February 11th, 2002

Time Event
8:41p
The Grammar Test
Your Score: 100%


I am a grammar expert! My skills are certainly being wasted here on the internet. Perhaps I should become a teacher.
Test yourself at geekykid.net
8:50p
8:58p
I'm one lucky bitch???

Who's your Fellowship fella?

I roll in the hay with Hobbits


Meaning: You're either very greedy or afraid of commitment. What you lust after in Merry is a man who can be your best friend and a fun roll in the hay at the same time, one who can laugh off problems in the heartbeat. However, he can also laugh at that weird birthmark on your ass. At least you don't have to worry about cold feet under the covers.
9:02p

What's Your Style? Find out @ She's Crafty

Meaning: You're a true nature chick who loves the outdoors. Because you're always running from activity to activity, you have zero time for a full, fussy face of makeup. Instead, you want to be able to hop out of the shower, pull your hair into a ponytail, slap on some sunscreen, and go. Just make sure that your laid-back, all-things-natural attitude doesn't lead to you become lazy -even on-the-go girls need to glam themselves up sometimes!
9:10p
I am Merf

Take the Test Yourself |
What does it mean?


The meaning: Merf merf. You're too damn cute to be hurt. You pounce, you bounce, you're fun fun fun fun fun! You were created to bring peace between the warring factions of Moo and Spoon. You're peaceful, tranquil, cuddly, snuggly and overall very cute. You're obedient, friendly and other good stuff like that. I wanna love you and squeeze you and hug you forever! If you follow me home, I'll keep you.
10:27p
**sigh**

Every time I start dating, I am immediately reminded why I stopped.

I actually really like this guy I just started seeing, Eric V. I genuinely do. I definitely feel potential. I doubt for marriage, but for some time period of fun & companionship (since I am in no hurry to marry, I don't look at every date as a "potential husband").

But now it seems he might be playing mind games with me. I could totally be wrong. I honestly don't know.

We met on a Wednesday, I think. Had dinner at Killer Shrimp. Were instantly comfortable with each other, laughed a lot, got along well. He went out of town that Friday, & he called & left me a voice mail when he returned on Monday. I returned the call either Tuesday or Wednesday, I forget. But we talked for 2-3 hours on the phone that night. I asked him if he wanted to go to karaoke with my friends & I on Friday night, & possibly hang out again on Saturday night, IF he could handle me two nights in a row! ;- So, Friday, Reggie & Alicia came to pick me up at home, & we went to Acapulco's for dinner & karaoke, & Eric met us there after work (he wanted to go home & shower). Reggie & Alicia liked him....Reggie appreciated that Eric liked to tease me as much as he does! :-) We went to the bar for karaoke, & after singing a song or two, I started having hot flashes, & feeling physically drained again, the way I had felt after my vertigo episode on Thursday night. So I sang my last song, & asked Reggie & Alicia if they wouldn't mind me & Eric bailing on them, & explained about my "episode" the night before. Of course, they were more concerned than anything, & I asked Eric to drive me home. This was a big step for me, because normally I would never show a guy where I live until I know him a little better. But I instinctively trusted Eric. Naturally, he agreed to drive me home. We just hung out on the couch, listening to Enigma. I started to feel a little better, & I think I finally made a move to kiss him (as opposed to him making the move). Basically, we just kissed for a bit, nothing major...he kissed my neck a bit, but it was really just lips & neck (just dandy by me...my two fave things!). I could tell he was really tired, as was I, so I suggested he stay the night, as opposed to driving all the way down to his parent's house (35 miles or so) while so sleepy. He said, "You wouldn't mind?" I said, "No, I'd rather you drive sleepy & die or kill someone." So we got a blanket, & cuddled up on one side of the couch (I have an L shaped couch...one side is a sofabed, & one side is two massaging recliners). Now...because he is sooo huge (6'5), it was pretty snug. I don't know why we didn't pull the bed out, but we just didn't think about it. He quickly fell asleep spooning me...but after about 15 minutes of basically hanging off the couch, I decided to move to the other side of the couch. I grabbed a couple of blankets & a stuffed animal for a pillow, & went to sleep. I didn't sleep well...not sure why. I think, for one thing, I still felt a bit icky, & for another, Toby kept clawing & whimpering at the back door. The alarm went off around 6:50AM, & Eric sat straight up & looked very confused. He says, "Why are you all the way over there? When did you move over there?" I said, "About 6 hours ago." :-) He asked if he had pushed me off the couch, & I just explained that I wanted him to have more room. I went back over to him, & we spooned some more before I had to get in the shower. He finally briefly {{gasp}} touched my breasts...and I was wondering how long that would take. It was nice---and refreshing---that it took that long. I told him I had to get into the shower, & he said, "Can I watch?" I said no, & told him to go back to bed. When I got out of the shower & got dressed, I went back to wake him up. I found Duncan sound asleep on Eric's chest, which was so adorable that I took a picture of it. I woke Eric up, & he asked how my shower was. I said, "Lonely." He reminded me that he had offered to help. I said, "No, you offered to watch...helping is something completely different. :-) He got up, put his sweater back on, & we left....me to go to work, & him to drive to his parent's house. I told him I would call him when I got off work, & we could meet at Olive Garden by the mall. I called him after work, & we said we'd meet at Olive Garden at 6:30PM...and I told him to look for me wearing a funky hat. He was waiting outside when I got there, & when I walked up, he said, "Nice hat." We had to wait 40-45 minutes for a table. When the hostess finally came to get us, she walked us to our table & turned around & said, "I LOVE your hat! It's adorable!" I stuck my tongue out at Eric, & he just laughed. The waitress came over, & she said, "I LOVE your hat!" She then went into her speech, pushing the liquor. She was talking about the Chardonny, when Eric cut her off, not wanting her to waste her time, & said, "Neither of us drink." She says, "Oh...would you like a margarita?" HUH?!?!? We got a good laugh out of that. We had a nice dinner, during which the waitress continually hit on me. When she would come over to ask us if we needed anything, she would focus entirely on me, barely glancing at Eric. I looked to my left at one point, & she was staring at me, & then winked at me! I am not sure that Eric really believe that she was hitting on me...until we left. We got up to leave, & she thanked us for coming. Then she looked straight at me & said, "I hope you come back again," & then, according to Eric who was walking behind me, she totally checked out my ass as I walked out. He was highly amused by that. I just said to him, "Men...women...they all want me. It's the curse that is me." We had a good laugh. We were going to go see a movie, & then I decided it was too late for that. He made me feel like an ass to his brother...who is a dope smoking, cigarette smoking waste-oid...by telling him I didn't like smokers or drugs. Whatever. I met his parents...whose only comment about me the next day was by his mother, who said, "That was an interesting hat." :-) Eric took me back to my truck, & my intention was just to hang out for a bit, & then head home early. A couple of hours of intense making out later, I finally headed home. He's an excellent kisser, & our styles are well-matched. Things were pretty passionate, & we certainly had a fun time. We stayed fully clothed, & it was just a glorified make-out session. I did HAVE to touch his peepee, cause I would have heard it from my friend Erin if I hadn't! ;- Standing on the floorboard of my big truck, I am just Eric's height (we are face to face when he's on his knees & I am standing). I think I finally drove home around 12:15, 12:30AMish, & hit an awful accident. I finally made it past that, & made it home. Got to bed around 1:30AM...way too late, but oh well. Sunday, I called Eric from work, & Erin got on the phone & thoroughly embarrassed me. She told him he was going to have to go through a "test," & that they had the final say on him. She asked him, "So, you like my friend?" He said yes, I was very nice. She says, "She's pretty too, huh?" Amy yells from the background, "She's a good lay, too!" Could I get any more embarrassed? Erin, of course, repeats that to Eric, who says, "I wouldn't know." I ask him if he wants to stop by my house on his way back to Northridge, & he said he would call & let me know. Sunday was a difficult day for me, because besides not getting enough sleep Fri/Sat nights, I also had sister drama to deal with (a whole other post), so I was really drained. Eric finally called around 9:30 or so, & asked if he could stop by. I told him that I was really too tired (meaning, too tired to fool around, basically), cause I was. He said he would only come over to give me a massage & tuck me into bed. So I told him he could stop by. He did as promised. He merely gave me a massage, didn't even try to kiss me. Again, I could tell he was really tired (after he laid his head on my butt & fell asleep, I figured it out), so I said, "Let's pull the bed out & lay down." He asked me to set the alarm, so I realized he wanted to stay the night. I pulled the bed out while he went to the bathroom, & set the alarm for him. He wanted to be able to have time to go home & shower & stuff before work. We woke up a little bit before the alarm, & fooled around a little bit...and had our first mutual orgasm...separate times, of course. And still fully clothed...heh-heh.
I feel like I am back in high school...it's great! He went to work, & I went back to sleep.

Which brings us to today.....I IMed him when I woke up, & we chatted briefly, before he had to go to a lunch meeting. When we both came back online later, things just seemed odd. He seemed a bit aloof, as if he was playing the "cool" routine. He had mentioned he wanted to get together on Tuesday night, because tonight he had volleyball. So I asked him if he wanted to get together tomorrow night, & I got the "Hmmm...dunno....tonight I have volleyball, & Wednesday night I have softball, & at some point, I have to clean my apartment, since I have been gone so much." Okay, but that leaves Tuesday night & Thursday night...why hedge it? Either he wants to see me again or he doesn't. I detest mind games. I also mentioned getting him something very small/casual for Valentine's Day, & made it clear that I do that for all my friends...he said that he's awful with getting & receiving gifts, & he'd be more comfortable if I didn't get him anything. For one thing, which we had actually already discussed, he's kinda anti-VD, cause he resents being told a certain day he has to be romantic, because you should be romantic 365 days of the year. Whatever. Then he sent a conflicting signal, & said I was welcome to stay over at his place anytime. I then told him to have a good game, & told him that if he wanted to have dinner & hang out this week, I was available pretty much any nights but Fri/Sat. His response? "Okie dokie. C ya." Instead of saying, "Ok, then, let's hook up Thursday night."

**sigh**

I am just NOT a patient person. And I detest head games. Maybe he is still interested but feels the need to emotionally pull back a little, after spending 3 days in a row with me. Maybe he felt we were getting too close too fast, & that scared him.

I am clueless. And being a controlling type who always likes to know what's up, where I stand, etc...this is hard for me. This is why I don't like dating, because, especially in the beginning, there's so much uncertainty. And I don't like uncertainty.

I am leaving the ball in his court...I am not calling him, & not emailing or IMing him again...and see what he does on his end.

Current Mood: frustrated
11:31p
Body scans?
I am interested in getting one of those full body scans. Has anyone reading this had any experience with these? I always have such freaky health problems, I thought it might not be such a bad idea. But it's around $1200 or so. That's a LOT of $$$. I might go see my personal doc first, tell him about all the crazy symptoms I have been having lately, & see what he advises.

The Olympics were kinda happy & sad today. Americans had a sweep of the halfpipe event, which was really cool (first sweep by Americans since 1956). But the pairs figure skating event was heartbreaking. The Canadians (Sale & Pelletier) were brilliant, & deserved the gold. The felt they had it, & the crowd loved them. Then they ended up being 1-2 votes short of first place, so they got silver. Not like winning a silver medal is crappy or anything, but no one "prefers" to be second best. And honestly, the Russians---who got gold---made a lot more mistakes. The Canadians routine was much cleaner. The crowd was stunned, & actually booed the judges. When the medal winners stepped onto the ice, the silver medal winners got more cheers than the gold medal winners. It was kinda sad for the Russians, though, because it wasn't their fault...it was the judges who fucked up. And the female Russian....she triumphed over near death to win that medal...she had to have brain surgery follwing an accident on the ice, & was paralyzed on the right side of her body, up until about 1997 or so. And now she's just won a gold medal. That's pretty cool. The Americans got 5th place...but the Americans don't seem to ever have pairs skaters that are that great. But 5th place is pretty good!

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