June 17th, 2002


Conflicint emotions....

I got booked to work as a stand-in on a movie. I am working tomorrow for sure, & maybe quite a bit more over the next two weeks.

I have conflicting emotions about it, for a few different reasons.

The woman who booked me says they are a GREAT crew to work for. That's great. The movie stars Steve Martin & Queen Latifah. Well, I have long had a crush on Steve Martin, & we have something in common...he started his career at Knott's Berry Farm. I hear he's pretty quiet...but I wonder if I could flirt with him? Heh-heh...and I worked with Dana (Queen Latifah's real name) many years ago on "Living Single," & since her castmate Kim Fields cast me in a movie that she saw, she just might remember me. She's really cool. It's always great to work on movies as a stand-in, cause you just never know when you might be seen by someone important. They are shooting at Disney Studios, which is just down the street from me. YAY! The best part is that I am DESPERATE for money. I am SOOO behind on bills, might not make rent, & will have NO spending money for my cruise. Not that working a few days is going to change all that, but it's a start. I wasn't going to have work all this week, so this is good. I get $125 a day, for 8 hours, plus free catered food! :-)

The negative emotions....I was actually truly looking forward to spending this week cleaning up. I wanted to chill today, & start cleaning tomorrow, & have the entire week to do it. My house is a nightmare right now. It's disgusting even to me. I started briefly on my pc room today. Now, I may not work every single day this week. And I might can finish my pc room tomorrow....I don't have to leave for the set until around 11:45AM or so. But I was honestly looking forward to having cleaning time. What if I work every single day this week? Great, money-wise, but I won't get anything done. I was also hoping to have lunch with Garry on Friday, & now I don't know if I will be able to. I will not likely know if I am working a certain day until the day before. Makes it hard to make plans. I am also supposed to see my friend's play on Friday night. I might have to cancel that, too.

The worst part? chappell is here next week. We have plans for dinner Monday night, Hollywood Tuesday, & the Del Mar fair on Wednesday. Now, if I am needed on the set those days.....I would have to cancel all that. That would seriously break my heart...but I could not turn down the work. One, I REALLY need the money. Two, I COULD be seen by important people. Three, they have already gone through 2-3 "flaky" stand-ins for this kid, & I don't want to let them down. I hope & pray that they either don't need me at all on Mon/Tues. (chappell was originally going to Del Mar without me on Wed., so that would be okay), or need me early in the AM & release me early in the day. I REALLY want to do dinner on Monday, & spend all day with him on Tuesday. I pray for that. It would also be nice if they didn't need me Friday of this week, so I could clean & see my friend's show. And then work me early Monday, released in time for dinner, & work me Wed/Thurs., off Friday. I told her I left for a cruise on the 28th, so she already knows they would have to replace me for the very end of the shoot (it's supposed to be done around July 3rd, & they don't shoot weekends).

Good news & bad news, truly....I hope everything works out.....
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