June 30th, 2003

real Alice

(no subject)

OK....I know that I am NOT "all that!" But I am no eyesore, either. I am a pretty cute girl, maybe even "pretty" on a good day. I realize that beauty is in the eye of the beholder....I have been called ugly, plain, cute, pretty, attractive, beautiful, gorgeous, hot, etc.......ugly to hot is a huge jump.

But 1s & 2s & 3s???? Ones??????? That screams jealous bitches to me. Or maybe people who like the goth or pierced look & I am too "vanilla" looking for them. But hey, even I can look at a goth person & tell if I think they are attractive DESPITE that not being a look I'm INTO. I'd probably rate myself somewhere in the 7-8 range...anything below a 5 is ridiculous, in MY opinion (& I'm not even having a good self-image day!).


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(no subject)

I am working my ass off.

And yet things never change.

I am at least $600 behind on necessary bills, such as electricity, cable, phone, etc. Electricity has already sent me a late notice & might get shut off soon. I have paid all the bills I had money to pay. I have to fill up my truck every other day (almost $30!). I have to buy groceries.

And now I find out my truck needs $1000 worth of repairs. Yeah. Right. Let me just pull that money out of my ass.


In addition to already being at least $600 behind, & rent due by the 7th.

That's just swell.

It's the ball bearings & the suspension on the left side....and both front tires need to be replaced. $585 in parts, almost $400 in labor. If I don't get it fixed it gets worse & worse. As it is, I have started having to wear ear plugs while I am driving on the freeway, because the noise is unbearable.

And I cannot let my electricity & phone get shut off.....sheesh.

And I am not kidding you. I work my ASS off! I work SO hard at this job, & 5-6 days a week. I barely have time for any sort of a personal life, time to do chores, errands, etc.

Life is really sucking for me right now. I simply cannot get ahead. I am slipping back down into a depression...and as usual, it's caused by money.
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