Pollyanna (alicenwndrln) wrote,

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Did you hear that sigh of relief???? The huge one I just breathed? I just got off the phone with my dad. He is paying my entire rent ($800) for this month (which, gee, is only already a week late). He is express mailing my landlords a check today. It should definitely reach them tomorrow, & tomorrow was the day my landlord was going to deposit my check (which would have bounced). Praise God. Hallalujah. Can I get an "AMEN?" AMEN!!!!!! Now....I have to pay him back. I told him I would pay him back----with interest---by December 2002. So I have a while. If that PhillySwirl guy was serious, I should be doing some commercials around April/May, so I should be able to pay EVERYONE back by summer. The potential is certainly there. I believe in myself, anyway. I emailed my dad to present the possibility of him lending me $500 for this month. We both know I have to get some sort of job in January, but I am stuck for December. I wouldn't be able to get a job quick enough to catch up on bills, plus who would hire me to work 1-2 weeks before I go out of town for a week? No one. I told him I needed it by tomorrow or I couldn't pay my rent, so could he Western Union it. He just called & said, "See, the problem is, you waiting til the last fucking minute to say you need money." He's funny. I love that I can cuss to my dad, & vice versa. We just have that kind of relationship (I had it with my mother, too, although she didn't cuss NEARLY as much...usually just playfully with me.....I'd say (playfully), "Fuck you, bitch," & she'd flip me off & say, "No, fuck you, bitch," in her little Southern accent. Too funny!). So he's totally bailing me out this month, but next month, I am truly on my own. What would be IDEAL is if he would agree to pay at least half my rent for a pre-determined time (say, 6 months), & since he doesn't trust me to not spend it on crap, he could mail the check directly to my landlords, like he used to do when I was 18. But I doubt he will do that. He wants to help me help myself....not just help me. Make sense?

So here's what he's doing now.....it's interesting, but it has my emotions in swirl.

He has presented me with the idea of getting a mobile home & living in a mobile home park. My assumption is that he would pay for it (the mobile home), & then I would pay the space rental & all my other bills.

Here's my problem with that. I have this nagging, snobby feeling that I am too good for a trailer park. When I think "trailer park," I think all kinds of nasty images of "white trash," "trailer trash," etc. But the other side of me knows that not every trailer park is trashy, & some very nice, classy people live in trailer parks. I just talked to my friend, Erin, who's a bigger snob that I am, & she thinks it's a good idea. Her boyfriend's grandparents live in a very nice park. My friend, Dean, lives in a really nice on in Fullerton. The problem is, I don't know how many "nice" ones I am going to find in LA County. I had one manager call me today, & he doesn't even have any available. He said one "might" be coming available soon, & gave me the guy's number. This park is in my same city, & it's truly "hit or miss" in this city, as far as niceness. It would be nice to have a home that I own, as oppose to rent, & just have to pay the space rental. Of course, with ownership, comes more responsibility. If the roof leaks, you have to pay to fix it. Plumbing problems, everything. You pay to fix them. But that's thinking too far ahead. My dad is also interested in looking at HUD homes. They are cheap, but sometimes need work. I found a 3 bedroom HUD house for sale for $60K. But it's probably in a bad area, & in sore need of work.

Also....the thought of packing up all my shit AGAIN & moving AGAIN makes me want to cry. Having DSL set up again....new phone number...new bills....and leaving my awesome neighbor....none of that appeals to me. Also, I will NOT move into a trailer park where there are lots of kids. If the place has a playground, I am running for my life. I moved to this house to get away from the sounds of children playing. And I don't like the thought of losing my backyard, as small as it is. Maybe I would have a small backyard area that I could enclose, so I could set up my jacuzzi. That would be nice. I will be finding a new home for Toby, so finding a place with a yard big enough to house a dog is not a concern.

Anyway....obviously....a lot of different thoughts & emotions are swirling through my head....I just wish that things would happen in my career soon, so that I could buy a nice 3BD home of my own, with a yard, & everything, in a nice area, etc. Or even better....enough to build my "dream home!"


Hey, a girl can dream.......

But I truly have the greatest dad in the world. He is really trying to help me.

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