Pollyanna (alicenwndrln) wrote,

  • Mood:
I no longer think I'm getting sick.

It's 3:30AM, & I was awoken by a high fever. I am running about 102 degrees right now. My body is ROASTING from the inside out. I wanted to sleep until 5AM (my flight leaves at 7:40), but that just wasn't gonna happen. Yesterday, I woke up with a croupy cough, with phlegm that tastes worse than any phlegm I have ever coughed up. Kinda zinc-y. It sounds like I have tons of fluid in my chest. My lips & eyeballs are so hot, you can feel heat coming off of them if you hold your hand a few inches away. Every muscle in my body aches, especially my back. It hurts to swallow. This seems to be mostly in my chest, not so much in my nasal passages. I have such a high fever, my legs are shaky. I am miserable.

And I get to fly all day like this. I hope I don't pass out on the plane, & I feel all kinds of guilty taking something this nasty on the plane with me, a confined space. I am gonna take my cough syrup so I can take that if I start coughing badly.

I don't mean to down negative, but honestly....what IS the point of living if I am seriously sick about every month & a half? That's too often for anyone to be sick. I don't know how much more I can handle.

I don't even wanna know what my dad will say. It seems like I am always sick, & I am. The LAST time he saw me, I was really sick. And he bought me hiking boots to go hiking this weekend & everything. I pray I am better by Saturday. (Andrea had this, & said it only hurts for "a day." I sure hope she's right. *sigh*

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    Still no clue what I'm going to do. No clue at all.

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