Yes, still alive. Just going nuts.
I was surprised to log back onto LJ after some time, & see how many people I adored had removed me from their friends list. I understand people who I rarely responded to removing me....but those that seemed closer....I was surprised by those. A few of them surprised me so much, I couldn't bear to remove them. A few I reluctanly removed...but I am hoping they will re-add me. I was especially surprised to see that people I have met in person removed me. And just for not posting in a while.
Then I decided to do some friend list cleaning of my own. I don't really delete based on who has & hasn't responded lately....if I did that, alomost everyone would be gone, because I haven't posted lately. Rather, I removed or kept people based on how close or unclose I felt to them. I pretty much kept anyone I have corresponded personally with (either in person or via emails), & those I have always had a decent, talkative LJ relationship with.
I hope no one is offended...and if anyone is just devastated that I removed you, please email me. I tried to mostly remove people whom I felt wouldn't give a poop.
It's just not practical for me to have so many people on my friends list. If I had time to talk to all of them frequently (by talk to, I mean respond to & read their posts), it would't be a big deal. But I have next to no time these days. I am hardly ever online at all. If anything, I log on briefly JUST to check my emails, so that I will not have 5 million the next time I log on. As you may have noticed, I RARELY have time to update my own journal, much less read y'alls. I am terribly sorry for that. I wish I could read & respond to every post ALL of you write....but I just don't have time for that lately. I wish I did.
I have been working 6-7 days a week, long hours when you include driving time. The past weeks, I have had rehearsals til 1-1:30AM, getting home around 2-2:30AM, collapsing into bed, & sleeping until I have to awake to shower & leave for work again. It's been insane. Friday night, I rehearsed til 1:15AM, got to bed around 3AM, then had to be up by 8AM to go to work & perform FIVE extremely high energy shows, including having all the big-wigs there watching. No pressure. I don't know how I made it through yesterday. Today has been my first complete day off in forever, & since I didn't set an alarm, I slept til 2:30PM! Days that I had off my show, I STILL had to go in for rehearsal, so I have been lucky to get one day off a week....at which time I have millions of errands to run, a house to clean, laundry to do, etc. All this work, & I am still broke & behind on bills. I cannot get ahead.
So forgive me for not being the greatest LJ friend. I am trying my hardest to keep up. I will not likely be able to keep up with your journals. I am barely keeping up with mine. Forgive me. If there is something you really want me to know, PLEASE email me about it. I am much more likely to read & respond to an email then have time to log onto LJ & rifle through people's journals. I truly want to keep up with you all, so if there is something important (good or bad), just kindly drop me an email or send me a link to your journal entry. That is the best I can do for now.
I will most likely be going back to having 2 days off a week....but I might have to find a second job. I just don't know.