Pollyanna (alicenwndrln) wrote,

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I hate drugs!

What's worse than being diagnosed with a shitty illness? The meds for that illness making you feel more shitty.

This is the 2nd time this has happened.

The grand mal seizures were bad enough, but at least they came and went. The anti-seizures meds are the pits. The side effects suck. And I'm stuck on them for life.

Now it's the bladder meds. The doc started me on one for overactive bladder meds, VesiCare, first, to see if just that would help. It helped make me very ill. Perhaps you aren't supposed to be active or in the sun while on that crap. I was dancing onstage yesterday and thought I might die. I seriously didn't think I'd last the day. I had dry mouth (great for an actor/singer), made my heart beat too fast, made me sweat beyond what was normal, and made me feel like passing out all day. I didn't take it last night, and won't take anymore. Tomorrow night, I will start the IC med, and pray that doesn't have the same side effects. If it does, I won't be able to take it, and that will mean I have ZERO treatment options, for something that has no cure. The Elmiron is my last hope. I also would stop taking it if my hair fell out.

I'm having a hard time coping with the diagnosis. The changes to my diet are so extreme. I can't afford to eat the way I should be, which is like all organic. I can't have anything with preservations. There isn't much that doesn't. I can't afford to eat organic foods. I can't have aspartame. I can't have ketchup, can't have most cheeses. I can barely eat anything. And I'm finding that even when I DO eat off the "allowable" list, the IC still flares up. I've been in constant pain every day in my abdomen. No fun.

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    Still no clue what I'm going to do. No clue at all.

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