I have completely obliterated my savings. Gone...not a drop left. No savings. I am as broke as they come. Very depressing.
I am a good $600-700 (at least) short for bills that have to be paid for the first of the month. Add to that, the $54 I have to pay to have Toby's blood work done prior to his surgery. <
I honestly don't know what I will do. All my friends are broke, so I can't borrow, & I hate doing that anyway. I have a little bit of money coming in next month, but it won't arrive til around the 10th, & that's way too late. I am up shit creek without a paddle, I am afraid.
I am going to get a job soon, at night. But that won't do me any good right now.
I am looking into two different jobs. One is a waitressing job where the waitresses/waiters spontaneously jump on the tables & burst into song. But I really, really, really don't want to waitress. So I am looking into this other one, where I would work in a bar where I wouldn't be NUDE, but scantily clad. I would imagine the tips will be good, & it's easy work, that's for sure (not that I am necessarily looking to not work hard!). I don't mind doing that, as a means to an end. If I am willing to struggle for my dream, I must be willing to do almost anything. I can't have much pride at this point. There is also the option of being a "telephone actress"....in other words, a 1-900 sex line. I'd rather not do that....I don't think I would be able to keep a straight face, & I don't know if I could sleep at night getting that raunchy with strange, sick men.
But I have to get something at night, to leave days open for auditions, & I don't want to work too late into the night (not a night person), & I need to make decent money. And I have to find something fast....cause this money situation just ain't cutting it (obviously).
I have to get into the mindset that this is what I chose to do, to pursue my dream. I knew it wouldn't be easy. I chose this. I made my bed, & now I have to lie in it, so to speak.
While walking Toby last night before bed, I ate it bigtime. He likes to go outside & run around (he pulls me, & fast!), but he also likes to just laze around inside in the air conditioning. So I said, "Let's go home," & he takes off RUNNING, break neck speed. Well, I was wearing these high heel slides, & tripped over a sprinkler head. I just ATE it, went sprawling. I twisted my ankle badly, & to prevent spraining it, I threw most of my weight onto my hand. While the rest of my body landed on the grass, my right hand happened to land, with most of my weight, on the concrete sidewalk (the rough kind). Besides scraping the skin, I popped a large blood vessel in the palm of my hand, by my wrist. It concerned me, cause I couldn't move my wrist very well, nor my fingers, & the vein was really swollen, sticking through the skin (but not breaking the skin). It was cute, cause Toby jumped on me & started licking me, as if to say, "Sorry! Don't cry!" I put ice on it, & today, I can move everything okay. It hurts if I touch it, & it's bruised very badly. The vein is also sticking out a bit still. I learned my lesson....I never walk him without tennis shoes on. :-)